Thursday, August 17, 2006
The Source Of Life starts at... 10:23 PM.
+Let there be Tears+hey guys. How're y'all doing? Good? As you know, I've been having a tough week and still am. Today was the worst. I actually cried after not crying for a long time! With one problem, comes another. Ain't life cruel? What have I done to deserve these difficulties? I'm faced with sudden and very difficult times so that is why I had to cry my eyes out just now. I can't take it!Why am I that depressed?My dad got admitted into the hospital yet again because he suffered a minor heart attack and of course, any member of the family would take it badly. Like me for example. It was so sudden so I could not stop worrying about him la. It happened in the morning about 3am and I was asleep when my mom woke me up. She said that they're gonna go to the hospital becuz my dad is having some sort of a muscle ache or something. So I went along. It's been only like a month and I was just about to tell myself to avoid Tan Tock Seng Hospital for as long as possible. However that was not to be the case and there I was, waiting outside of the A&E ward waiting desperately for news. I wasn't there when the doctor told my mom that my dad suffered a minor heart attack and when she called me at home (I went home first because my mom felt that she forgot to turn off the stove- which it is indeed off), my heart sank my mom told me the results. A minor heart attack? Imagine that happened to your dads. Obviously you'd be shocked right? It's like a lot of people die of heart attacks right? Alhamdulillah it's a minor one, if not my dad won't able to see me graduate from JC! That thought made me had a tear or two because I was really scared.He's in the ICU now as the doctors want to monitor him for the next few days and alhamdulillah, he's agreed to a bypass that'll be conducted at NUH. I hope he goes through surgery afely. Pray for him please?Then today, I cried like hell! It's like I was approached by Cikgu Suryati yet again about the video and she pressed on about me being irresponsible again. I can't stand it! How can she call me irresponsible when all this while, I'm the one who's been doing most of the work- importing, editing and the other fucking thing that is needed? I've been trying to get the group to come together to do the video but I couldn't due to different time tables! I've been trying to get this member of mine to come for the project and I waited like a fucking idiot in the media room doing the video while a class is on, possibly eyeing on what I was doing. F*ck la! I hate it! I was so pissed by this that I shouted to my Cikgu Suryati. What do you expect, I was pissed (and still am) and you know me right? When I get angry I would show it right? So that was what I did la. I really really can't stand it. I had less sleep, I had my dad lying in the ICU and I was blamed to be irresponsible made me lose it. So I cried my eyes out! ARGH!Hope I'll get my strength back so that I can face these challenges. For now, take care...To be called irresponsible,
Is unbearable,
DOn't break my heart,
Don't play me cards,
Don't treat me like fuck,
Or I'll poke your eyes OUT!
Be Saved, Shout It Out |
